OK, it's time to come clean. The DNA tests are conclusive and I'm sorry to disappoint everyone. They prove beyond reasonable doubt that JONO MILES from Britain's Got Talent band THE ARRANGEMENT has no genetic connection whatsoever with Boris Johnson, the blond-bombshell Mayor of London, and every connection, I'm glad to say, with me.
I did nearly ask my wife in as playful a way as possible if she'd ever met Boris. After all, she loved to trip the light fantastic at some very swish London night clubs when she was single, and has admitted sharing the dance floor with several celebs including the notorious Jack Nicholson. My courage failed me, mainly because she was wielding a rather intimidating frying pan at the time.
To say I'm proud of Jono would be a massive understatement. But he's still got his A levels to sit, damn it, so we're trying to keep his size tens on the ground and gently persuade him to do some work between TV and press interviews.
Still, he owes me - big time. About 12 grand should cover it. This is the very nice fee I lost out on by cancelling some concerts in Portugal the week after Jono's BGT audition, to which I went along. Sitting in the 3500 strong audience at the Hammersmith Apollo, I shouted so loud and wrecklessly in his support that my voice was shredded and it frustratingly failed to respond to restorative treatment in time. Waddamistake-a-tomake-a!!
Anyway, a bi-product of Jono's fame is some attention being focused in my direction. I don't think it entirely coincidental that on the day I was 'outed' as Jono's "famous opera singer dad" in THE SUN, my website's daily hits rose from a modest average of 8 to a comparatively impressive 45!
So there we are: popular recognition at last after 25 years - but Jono's achieved even more in just 2 days.....